Run Forrest, Run!

Forrest Gump is one of my favorite movies of all time.  I often refer to it with my Facebook posts.  One of my favorite quotes is:  My momma always said, "Life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." 

So, I found it a bit ironic recently when I found myself having a Forrest Gump monent.  Have you ever had a moment in your life when you felt a bit like Forest Gump does after Jennie leaves?  If you remember, he was not sure what to do.  So, he just started running.

I found myself in a similar situation recently.  My husband did not leave me, thankfully.  But the situation I found myself in was a very hurtful one. I did not know what to do and I had an undeniable urge to run.  So, I listened to my body, heart and mind and I went for a run.  I am glad to say that while the situation was not over.  I felt better equipped to deal with it.

I have a feeling that I will be running a lot more in the future.

20 Years Together

Yellow Roses are one of my favorites.  As you probably know from a previous post, I have a tattoo of a yellow rose on my ankle.  I got that yellow rose on my ankle when I was 19.  That story, I will save for another day.

My husband does not often get me flowers.  So, when he does they mean a lot to me.  7 February, he surprised me, he returned home from a business trip and had 2 dozen yellow roses with him.  It was the anniversary of the night we start dating.

I have a lot to thank him for over the last 20 years.  It has been an interesting ride filled with many ups and downs.

We have been involved in:

•  family squabbles,
• our own fights,
• the births of our children, 
• weddings, 
• graduations, 
• birthdays, 
• buying homes, selling homes, 
• moving states, moving countries, 
• deaths of loved ones, 
• car accidents (mine), 
• kids in emergency rooms, 
• shoulder surgery and kidney stones (him), 
• death threats (seriously, no joke, those would be mine), 
• session of counseling (mostly mine and one couple session), 
• my messiness and 
• his refusal to eat anything colored green (with the exception of raw spinach).

We have gone a long way in 20 years, literally and figuratively.  My husband is my harshest critique and my biggest cheerleader.  He is my rock and my best friend.  Thank you, honey for the last 20 years.  Each year has gotten better and better.  Though I am not looking forward to aging and watching our children grow up (that part brings many tears), I am glad that I have you to spend the rest of my life with....

Thank you for seeing the real me, knowing what I am capable of, not giving up on me when I wanted to and while other have.  Thank you for all your support on my journey to be a better person and thank you for being my partner in this thing we call life.  I love you.

6th Form

My oldest son is in his last year at St. Nicholas School in Harlow. The school literally does not have any more grades or as they call them here in the UK years, past his current year in school.

As you might remember, the kids here can technically be done with school at age 16.  The law is in the process of being changed and will be fully in place by 2013.

In the meantime with our future being nervously passed around and no formal extension in place, we realized in a panic in December that Colin needed a back up plan for the fall.  So, I had a quick meeting with the school and formulated a battle plan. Knowing his study habits and need for supervision, they were able to point me toward a few different schools to start the application process.

So far he has applied to one school.  The Herts & Essex High School.  We received notice that they were having a short interview with all prospective applicants.  My son and several from his school had their interviews last night.  He was nervous and was unsure how it went.  Knowing my son, he was fine.  He, like his mother, has the gift of gab.  He is also lucky enough to be very smart and he has high predictions for his GCSE tests.  Now, I guess we just continue the process for now!

Chasing Rainbows? I wish...

Apologies.

I learned long ago that a meaningful sorry takes some real thought.  I have tried hard to teach this concept to my children.  One summer we spent the afternoon listening to a program on NPR about it.  Then we discussed it and practiced it.  In fact, we still practice it.

Meaningful apologies are important.  This >>>>> “I am sorry that you found my comment offensive” or “I am sorry that you felt that way".  Ok, well thanks.  Do you feel better?  Nope?  Me either.  In both cases the offender never actually acknowledges that they were wrong or takes any responsibility for their behavior(s).  Those apologies lack sincerity, heart and avoids all responsibility.

Another thing that I have learned about apologies is that you can’t chase someone with apologies.  If they don’t want to hear them, it is not going to have any effect.  Sometimes, what has happened has nothing to do with you.  So, I have a strict no chasing anyone for apologies policy.  If there is a problem, then I wait for it to be brought to my attention, so that we can deal with the situation as adults. If you can’t or won’t do that, hmmmm, well, I am going to assume that you are looking for more (like drama and confrontation), and I am not doing it.  I would rather be chasing rainbows.....

Lactose and Gluten Free

A couple of year ago, I noticed that my body was changing.  I could have just chalked it up to age.  But, know what I know, I had an idea that it was something more.

I decided to go dairy and gluten free for two weeks.  I noticed differences, almost immediately.  My tummy was not as bloated and I was not as gassy.  When I started adding things back into my diet, I was a bit impatient.  I added both dairy and gluten in at the same time, so I was not able to pin point what exactly was causing problems.  Over the last few years, I have been able to determine that I definitely have some dairy intolerance, but since gluten could still be a problem because of the harm that it does the small intestines, I still can’t completely rule out that I have an issue with gluten.  

On Monday, I decided to go completely gluten and dairy free again.  I made the decision for a few reasons.  First, I really need to get a handle on what is causing me the problems.  Second, I need to figure out if I can tolerate any other dairy like cheeses or yoghurts.  Some people with lactose intolerances can tolerate them.  

I have been having a hard time avoiding dairy and gluten in the UK.  I love clotted cream teas!  When I am at a friends house, it is customary to be offered tea.  I don’t care for it black and I don’t bring my dairy free coconut milk.  My friends are so used to putting milk in tea that I often do not get my request in before they have made it white.  I also LOVE cheese.  We often eat crackers and cheese as a snack on Saturday and Sunday’s.  Plus, my favorite desserts in the UK have lots of dairy and gluten involved.  And one can’t forget that I am now doing some work for a local bakery that has a fantastic little cafe...

Going gluten free is also more difficult for me here since I have not attempted any real baking ventures.  My husband insisted that I leave my Kitchen Aid mixer at home.  Enough said.

Recently I discovered these wonder products in the grocery store.  Free From.

The package is easily marked.  The little bubbles in the corner nicely tell me what it is “From Free”.  These bakewell tarts are actually my favorite. My complaint about the products are that they seem to contain glucose-fructose syrup, otherwise knows as high fructose corn syrup.  Doh!  Now I know why my ADD is going crazy!

The NHS does have testings and if all else fails at the end of my trial, I may just end up getting testing done.

Psst... Did You See That?

My husband often sees something that someone is wearing and nudges me with a ‘Did you see that?’.  It usually includes a very incredulous look and if we are in close proximity, it is whispered.  Sometimes I see the fashion faux pas before he points it out to me.  It might be an unusual tattoo or piercing, a bright orange spray tan, maybe something that someone said or even an odd hair cut or color.  

While I have never seen anyone look quite like the photo above, I have seen some interesting things.  And definitely different then what you would find in Fort Wayne, Indiana.  

It is so easy to stereotype, isn’t it? When we see people dressed certain ways, with piercings, various tattoos, bright orange fake tans, outrageous hairstyles.... it is so easy to go down that road.  They are making a statement, no doubt.  In particular, I have to be careful where I lead myself when going down that road.  It is so easy for me to get caught in thinking the negative, particularly so because I am related to people that have lived the negative lifestyle that can come to mind when you see some of the aforementioned things.

I always wonder what leads people to choose what they have tattooed on their bodies.  Tattoo are a permanent marking. I have one, it is a yellow rose on my ankle.  It does have significance to me, my Aunt Adrienne, who died when I was in college, loved yellow roses.  I know that sometimes people get them impulsively.  Look at David Beckham, his arms are covered in tattoos.  Do they all have a significant meaning to him or were they an impulse?  I have a friend or two that is my age that have had their tattoos removed.  They are smart women and just found that they were not what they wanted anymore.

If David decides he does’t want his anymore... on advice of my friends, apparently they hurt like hell to remove.

Then I started to reflect on piercings.  While I do not find some piercings particularly pleasing to look at, obviously some people do.  Piercings are becoming more and more common.  Here they are very common, many women have their noses pierced.  My husband often teased me before we moved to the UK and said that I would be wanted my nose pierced, because so many of the women that he saw had them.  So far, I can report that I have not gained anymore piercings, while living here.  When I was in my 20’s, I wanted to have my nose pierced and I still contemplate having my naval done .  I am really glad that I did not go through with having my nose done.  I have enough trouble trying to remember to wear earrings!  Plus, it turns out that I scar very easily.

At least the hair styles and orange spray tans are something that is not permanent.  The area that I live in, the orange spray tans are known as “Essex Orange”.  When we are out Saturdays doing errands, we always see one or two women in Harlow with an orange tint to their skin.  Personally, I’ll skip the Ompahloompa look, that is unless I want to dress the part at Halloween!

And if I ever start wearing more then one item of animal print at a time, please friends, start an intervention!

I am sure it would never get that far.  My husband would never let me out of the house... 

  

Duvet Days

In the UK, often when my friends or their children are having a yucky kind of day, they have a duvet day.  The spend the day cuddled up on the couch, snuggled up in blankets, relaxing and watching movies.

Today I am home with my ten year old.  He has been struggling with a cold for a couple of days now and last night we noticed that he was running a low grade fever.  This morning he woke up with the fever again, along with his sniffles and coughs.

I was not too disappointed about the thought of having a duvet day with him.  Last night was not a good night for sleep.  Last night before bed, our dog Chip managed to get into the food waste bin under the sink. He puked three times last night.  So, poor mommy is tired, the 10 year old is feeling under the weather and Chip still seems to not be feeling so well himself.  Hopefully a duvet day and some meds for those of us that need it and and bland diet for Chip, will set us all feeling better.