Knowing Your Limits ( A Post About Yoga)

We all have limits: emotional; physical; financial.... and in sometimes it is easy to figure out when we have reached them.  It is also easy to go over those limits and go into debit.

Ten years ago, I started on an important journey.  I took my first Yoga training to be an instructor.  It was something that I was very interested in learning more about and looking back on that opportunity, I can say that it was a truly something that I needed.

I learned something very simple.  Our bodies have physical limits, which is kind of a 'no duh' thing.  That gem of information that was dispensed with the additional information on how we need to acknowledge this limitation and accept it.  Often we use that limitation to measure ourselves against others in the room and form a competition.  This can lead us down the road for failure and frustration.  "I stink at Yoga because so and so can do the splits and I can't.  So, now I am going to quit."  Ah, no.  Yoga and my very wise teacher gave me the courage to accept my limitations and to work harder to overcome them.

I am a highly competitive person.  I can freely admit this.  I am also guilty of quitting when I see no ability of winning or succeeding.  At the time of my training, I was 8 months pregnant with my now 9 year old son.  Looking back at my training, it was probably better for me that I was pregnant as I did the training.  It enabled me to really say, well, of course I have limits!  I had to have limits because of my pregnancy.  It enabled me to really listen to the wisdom that my teacher was imparting to me.

The ability to know your limits and acknowledge them is so important.  I can freely acknowledge my limits in my Yoga classes and I am continually learning about my other limits and learning to acknowledge them.

This week I was reminded of my physical limits during my hot Yoga class.  I had missed class last week and it has just been a very stressful couple of weeks, so I  was struggling mentally and physically.  I am also not the biggest fan of hot Yoga, the heat makes me feel like I am drowning.  When I reached the first 20 minutes of the class, I was considering walking out.  I did not think that I was going to be able to physically or mentally make the whole hour and a half.

 I have to be very aware of my limits during the class because it is so much easier to injure yourself doing hot Yoga.  You are in a hot room and your body can do more.  I am lucky because I really like my instructor, and I feel that I can trust her.  We have both learned things from each other as we have become acquainted.

Since we have a different training background, I do some of the positions a little differently.  When I first started, she was quite dogmatic about the differences in how I was positioned in poses.  In questioning me about it, she learned why I did the pose differently and she allowed herself to accept that the differences were truly ok.  Her listening and acceptance was really important to me.  I already liked her teaching style, and this made me realize that I could trust her as an instructor.  This was very important to me because when I went to my (first and) last Yoga class in England, the instructor inadvertently hurt me while using her hands to adjust me.  She did not realize that I was at my limit and she pushed me past it with her adjustment and hurt me.

This week as I struggled though class with a load of things on my mind and in the midst of battling a wonky neck/shoulder issues, I found that the trust I had placed in her was completely rewarded.  She listened to me as I hit my wall of limits earlier then usual because of the physical and emotional load that I carried.  The instructor reached out to adjust me to assist me into a pose.  I had to let her know that she had to be careful as I had sustained an injury though adjustment before.  She worked with me verbally to reach beyond what I thought were my limits and find limited success.

I left class glad that I came and in a mentally better place for it.    Even though I knew what my personal limits were, I was able, with her help to move a little beyond them.

Pumpkin Pie

So, now that we are fully intrenched into fall, the kids are pining for some of the food we traditionally eat in the US.  My youngest two were really looking forward to be back in the US by Halloween.  We had some tears, so I promised that we would find a place to trick or treat with costumes this year.

Pumpkins have been appearing at the grocery store and my youngest was very keen to get some for carving last week.  We picked up a few of the sugar pumpkins and he was thrilled at the thought of eating pumpkin pie.  I promised that we would get some big pumpkins on the weekend when everyone was with us.

So, the weekend came up.  My husband and I had an invite to a party.  He had volunteered that I would bring something.  He wanted me to bring Grandma Beary's baked beans, but we reached a compromise which entailed me making a pumpkin pie.  He was even able to find a disposable pie tin at the store which took the bother away from having to worry about bringing the dish home.

Making a pumpkin pie is work here, almost an ordeal (for me anyway).  Since I can't find pumpkin in a can, I have to cook it from scratch.  If you have ever worked with cooked pumpkin, you know that it has a lot of water in it.  So, the water has to be strained out to make the consistency right which was one thing that I learned last year.  So, I cooked and strained and then added all the ingredients and cooked the pie.

It seemed that upon trying the pie at the party, it because apparently very quickly that I had forgotten one 'key' ingredient.  Sugar.  We quickly hid the pie and explained the snafu to our few friends that had looked forward to trying this long heard of American confection that my husband had boasted about at work....

So, I am going to make it again.  This time, I am sure that I won't forget the sugar!  Also in celebration of our youngest's half birthday, we are going to try and to make chicken like Chick-Fil-A.

Our UK Cars and Our Constant Tire Troubles

So, as you know by now, we own 4 cars.  The two that we have here and the two that we have in the US.

There are days when owning two is more then enough trouble, for about 2 weeks in February, owning 4 became hell.  Thankfully, I did not have to deal with the issue that was occurring in the US, my dad had to take care of it for us.  It turned out that my husband's car decided to have battery trouble.  Battery trouble with our US cars seems to be a given.  My Oddessey is always having crazy problems.  Mostly because the lights don't automatically turn off and I am constantly finding some way to drain the battery.  I have already had replace two.

Our cars here seem to have issues with tires.  In February, my car had a flat that was quickly followed by my husband's car following suite.  My husband just has bad luck.  My tires seem to have been helped by me.  Let me explain!

In England the roads are very narrow and when big vehicles come down the road they are often slightly over the center line.  Between that and right after we arrived I came upon a head on collusion that had just occurred.... let's just say that I hug the outside of the lane.  So, when I there are hedges on the side of the road, it is common that my car is scraped by the branches.  Also, I lost my passenger hubcap within the first week of owning the car because I rubbed it enough against the curbs that it fell off.  Not to worry, over half of the other drivers in the UK are missing theirs as well.  I was just trying to fit in!!!!

This month our cars both have to go in for the yearly MOT test.  They have to pass a certain safety tests to ensure that your vehicle is road worthy.  My car should pass with flying colors, after I get the front passenger tire replaced for the second time.... this time it is not just a new tire that I need, but also a rim.  Let me explain!!!!!  Two weeks ago, we were late for school when my second son realized that he had forgot his gym uniform. So, we turned back and he grabbed it.  So, with this delay, we headed off.  We found a point in traffic along the way in which a lorry was trying to go around a parked car.  He needed to go into my lane to do it.  In my haste to give him room I tried to pull over in a drive, I misjudged in hit, a CURB!  Bye-bye rim and tire.  I had to refill the tire 3 times to get the kids to school.  Once we arrived, my dear friend Terry changed my tire for me and saved me yet again.

Terry is staff at the boys school and I have found his friendship invaluable.  The school employs a handy dandy mobile mechanic named Lenox.  Lenox fixed my brakes in a lengthy 3 week time period this summer.  I turned out to be more then the brakes...  Terry was kind enough to put up with having my car as a guest in his driveway for 3 weeks.  See, he is a great friend!  I will certainly miss him when I come back home and I will have to resort to finding my way out of my own car emergencies again!

My husband's car currently needs some attention from our mobile mechanic now.  It looks and sounds like he is going to need some new rear brakes, hopefully that is it.  We recently got the Tank 2 new to us tires before we went on our holiday north at the end of August.  Then three weeks ago he had another flat (not one of the new tires either) this tire has the flat sealer in it for now.  I am hoping that it will do for now.  I am tired of buying tires.

My Reflections: Sour and Sweet

I can't believe that it has been a full year.  But it has, the sun has the same fall like glow now, like it had when we first arrived.  We have been in England now a full year and experienced each of the four seasons.  It has been a year filled with sours and sweets....and one that I would never trade, ever.

I think that overall we have all done really well in the last year.  We have learned things about each other and ourselves that we did not know before.  We had the ability to slow our life down a bit and we have.  Most recently we started a new sharing activity at the dinner table that we call Sour & Sweet.   We each have to tell one thing bad and then one thing good that happened to us during the day while we were away form each other.  The kids in particular are really enjoying it.

So, in the spirit of the game, here is our in in sours and sweets!

<sweet> So, reflecting on the past year, I have decided that I am indeed a super hero mom.  <sour?>  I still hate to clean house, my house here is still a bit messy, but I am still a super hero.  I found us a home, school and cars within 28 days of setting down on English soil.  No small feat!  While doing all that I learned to drive on the other side of the road which involved learning all about round-abouts, giving way, the importance of paying for parking all the while reacquainting myself with a manuel transmission!

Some notes for driving, when you see a red L on a car, strange as it may seem, it does not stand for LOOSER, but LEARNER, sweet.  Just this week a line of cars (with me included) passed a learner car that was doing maybe 20mph, the speed limit was 40mph, sour.  The national speed limit is 60mph and you can do it on small curvy, 2 lane roads.  Sean thinks it's cool and drives it like a race driver while I am white knuckled and peeling myself from the dash, scary and sour.  Rounds a-bouts are brilliant, sweet!  They generally keep traffic moving better then traffic lights.  That said, with the news of our extension, my husband and I both have to get a UK license, sweet.  Technically, we are violating right now by not having it, sour.  We both have to take written and driving tests to pass, sour.  Thankfully, we don't have to have the red L on our cars while we are earning our license, SWEET!

We have learned about British cuisine.  Which thankfully is not much different then American (which my dear niece and nephew seemed relieved to experience after they arrived sweet!).  The Brits enjoy a good roast, anytime of the year.  We now find ourselves craving one as well and eat them when the urge comes upon us.  We have developed a love for lamb and good sausages. <lots of sweets> We have also developed a taste for some curry.  We have had to make do with Italian food and pizza that is decidedly different, sour.  There are definitely tastes that we miss: like Buffalo Wild Wings, Panera Bread, 5 Guys Burgers and Fries and Chick Fil-A, very sour.  (though I am glad we missed the controversy).  On the plus side, last weekend we ate at Hard Rock London and I got the best salad I have had since I arrived, sweet.  Seriously, the Brits do salads poorly, sour.  We have developed a love for new veggies, peas and Brussel Sprouts, sweet.  Jelly is jello and jam is what we eat on our scones with clotted cream, sweet.

We have our Chippy dog with us, but we miss our little Cricket and our kitties, Tux and Coco. Sweet and sour.

We have had some fantastic travels, sweet.  The funniest thing (though not at the time) is trying to convince the kids how lucky that they are and then trying to educate them on what they are seeing and why it is important, sour and frustrating!  It is so rewarding though when they are able to share their experiences with their classmates and the teacher makes a big deal out of what they saw.  It warms this Mum's heart. Sweet!

We are all guilty of speaking with a 'bit' of a British accent.  My oldest son told me recently that he speaks more with a British accent then the substitute teacher from Boston.  Hmmmm... O.K.   We say things like fivers (for a £5 note), bits, can't be bothered, lovely, we call our chips crisps and our fries chips.  I invite my friends to mine for coffee or tea and they invite me to theirs.  Lots of sweets here!

None of this really applies to sweet or sour!  :) I still do occasionally get asked where I am from.  Though many of the shops that I frequent are used to my American accent.  There are some words that I will never be able to think of in the American sense anymore.  If you say 'fanny pack'?  Well, here your 'fanny' is in a DIFFERENT place, that is why they call it a bum bag.  My kids still get the Mick taken out of them for being American.  Most recently my second son was told by his friend <after he had acid spilled on him in Chemistry, that hurt> that he was 'disappointed as my son was not the tough American he thought all Americans are and that America needs to loose some wars'.    What?  Oh and yes, we learned that what is pronounced wot not watt.  The Brits also apparently have something against r's as they rarely make the 'r' sound.  It is not a carrr, it is a ca'.

My oldest son has developed a need to collect watches, he blames his classmates saying that it is very English to wear different watches sweet/sour who knows!  My youngest son has heartily embraced eating fish and chips and sausages, sweet.  He also loves Lemon Sherbet candy, yum <well you should know, it's candy!>  My 9 year old loves lamb.  My husband loves Steak and Ale pies and anise seed balls.  We have all developed a taste for Cadbury chocolate and my husband really enjoys a good cider <which is alcoholic>.   All sweets!

We are having a good time watching BlackAdder,  Dr. Who and Topgear!  I love to watch Downton Abby.  We are also into the music scene.  We have tickets to see Florence and the Machine and Mumford and Sons in December.   And of course we had a great summer seeing quite a few bands as well.  Again, more sweets!

I have developed an addiction to tea.  I drink it hot at all times of the year.  I am a bit of an abnormality as I drink mine with sugars (2) and because I have developed a dairy allergy I drink mine black or with coconut milk.  When it is cool out, a nice cuppa something hot is brilliant.  Sweet for now, when I come back, who knows!

In a refreshing twist, I am now no longer one of the shorter women.  Many women are shorter then my 5.4 3/4' statue.  Recently during a night out, I was looking at the girls in the bar with very tall platform heels on.  I was still holding my own against the majority, even with their heels on.  It's nice not being the midget.  It also makes me realise that my 8/10 size that I wear here is totally appropriate.  The shoe sizing is also different here as well.  I find myself wearing anything from a 4.5 to a 5.5.    Sweet!

All and all we have had a year filled mostly with sweets, and I am so glad.  It makes staying here longer sweet.