Why My GPS is a Crabby, Bossy Hag

Don't get me wrong, I am glad that I have a GPS right now.  Generally, though I have never been a fan and I have resisted getting one for a long time.  I live in Indiana for goodness sake!  I have never really needed one, and in the past, I have just used Mapquest or Google maps.  I am luckily enough to generally be able to look at the directions and be able to drive places.  I also have a fairly good memory if I have been somewhere before.  In England, it is a total different story.

I have always disliked the GPS when I have ridden with them in the past and I finally figured out why as yesterday I was told endlessly where to go ALL day.  It is the voice, her voice.  Let me digress why.  I love the British accent.  It was a total plus in moving here getting to listen to it all the time, and I adapt easily and I have already started to pick up the intonation. (When I lived in Kentucky I started to pick up the southern accent as well) The British have a lilt to their speech and intonate their voices higher in pitch in their sentences and words, especially toward the end.  I associate that with politeness and as everyone that I have encountered talk that way and seem so polite and courteous.  Well, my GPS?  We have it on the British speak, and it has always bothered me.  I now know why.  Her voice is monotonous and flat. She sounds bossy and naggy.  Who wants to drive around in a car with a crabby, bossy, nagging GPS?  Apparently I do if I want to know where to go and how to get there!

My GPS apparently likes to sight see as well, or at least wants me to take the most circuitous route possible.  Which, honestly, it is not all the bossy, naggy hags' fault.  Sometimes it is my fault because I can't understand what she is saying and I miss turns or exits.  Roads and such as not always as well marked as she may think!  I am convinced that she sometimes directs me to the wrong exit on the round about on purpose, just so she can make me turn around in the next round about.  Secretly, I think that she is laughing at me and is taking immense joy in sending me in circles.  I think that she knows that I hate her....

New Definition of Torture

We have been in a hotel since we had arrived last Thursday, September 28.  It was a nice hotel, a Marriot.  We got free breakfast, it was warm, we had a nice TV with more then 4 channels, and may I mention that it was WARM, the staff was helpful, ever so polite and nice ("Yes, Mrs. Beary.  How may I assist you?").  We had connecting rooms, but no real living space.  Which at times can be annoying, but really, how often were we really there all together?

We had discussed changing to a different hotel because we had talked about living up in Bishop's Stortford, which is a town north of where Sean works in Harlow.  The hotel was south of both points, so at first, it looked like I was going to do lots of driving.  But, as I dove into the housing and school situation, it became apparent that there was no way we would be living in Bishop's Stortford.

Sean had other co-workers that had been in the area for about 4 months and they lived in temporary housing.  Sean was bound and determined that we were going to move there, come **** or high water.  Despite, anything that I said.  So, I shut up, packed up and we arrived last night.

I am not exactly sure where we are, to be honest.  We arrived in the dark, after a late dinner.  We were on a winding little horse cart of a road and on our first try we turned into the wrong place.  We finally found the place and was directed by a helpful, soon to be neighbor where to go to check in and Sean paid.  I do know that when I looked out the bedroom window this morning I saw horses.  Then when I looked out the living area window I saw the cars, a couple of other cottages, round hay bales and a tractor.

We walked in and it seemed ok, except for the gas like smell in the kitchen/living area.  I pointed it out to Sean and was instantly told to shut up.  Really?  Because the smell of gas IS great, right?  Oh, but we do have a self catering kitchen (because it is in my wildest dream to cook right now), a TV with 6?  channels and washer/dryer combo though, ooooo, celebration.  Oh and the bathroom... can I mention the bathroom?  It smells, much like the bathroom did in the hotel that we stayed in while we went to Milan.  It is not quite like a port a potty, but has a definite eau de poo smell and about that washer/dryer combo?  I think that I may finally understand why my English friend Carly mentions ironings so much on Facebook.  All the clothes came out wrinkly and not completely dry.  I might add that I took them out right away and put them on a drying rack.  ( I just wanted to go to a laundry mat, but Sean insisted that was not going to happen.)

So, we all got ready for bed and shut out the lights.  One thing that became apparent was that the road was very close.  We could hear cars race by occasionally all night.  I say race because remember last night I described the road as a little horse cart?  Where we are is a little curvy area on the small narrow road.  I wonder how fast those cars are really going because it sure sounds fast.

So, as morning came upon us, I start hearing a cow, mooing.  It was also freezing cold!  Ok, where am I really?  As I was looking around this morning I found the receipt, the name of the place that we are staying?  Delmond Barns, great.  So, here I sit, freezing and smelling gas, sipping hot tea.  We are wandering around with blankets wrapped around us and the warmest clothes that we have on our bodies.  Guess this is going to push me to make a fast decision on a home!  Brrrrr!  But hey, on the plus side I have free internet!

Houses

So, Sunday though today (Thursday, October 6) has been filled with the housing and school search.

I am going to talk mostly about the housing search now.  I will mention that I have found two schools of interest that have openings.  I have been meeting with them both, details to follow when we have success!

All the homes that we have looked at have at least 4 bedrooms.  One thing that I had already knew was going to be an issue was closet and storage spaces in bedrooms, not all homes that storage.  The other issue that became apparent as we looked, was that we needed at least one or two rooms more then what we would live in, a multi-use room.

Sunday we looked at two homes. The first home had very small bedrooms, was very modern and neutrally decorated.  It was just enough space for us to live in, but missing the multi-use room.  It was located in Bishop's Stortford in a neighborhood with lots of homes in close proximity.  The second home was located in a community of homes and because it is an older house it had a name, which made it a bit harder to find.  The houses around it were all older as well and it was definitely not a town or city.  It maybe was a village but I don't remember seeing a pub.  It had a very nice use of space, the bedrooms were good sized, the decor could benefit to be a bit more neutral, especially the red carpet.  (Perhaps we are a bit spoiled?)

Monday, we toured a school and then went directly to look at a home very close in proximity.  I was very excited about both, but Sean asked me to keep looking as he had hoped to be in a different place so that he had an easier time getting to work.  So, I kept at it.

Tuesday was a quiet day that the kids and I spent at the hotel.  I talked to the school I had looked at and arranged for the boys to visit on Wednesday.  I filled Wednesday with appointments to look at homes.  It was as I looked at the first house (which was very nice on the inside BTW) that I realized we needed more then just 4 bedrooms, a living room, a dining room and a kitchen.  We just have to have at least one room for the boys to do homework, to store their musical instruments etc....

So, armed with that knowledge and the fact that the boys had a great visit at the school.  I have narrowed it down to two homes that are very nice.  This afternoon I talk to the school to determine if the boys will be able to attend.

How I Lost My Husband...

Yes, yes, yes.... I lost Super Handsome.  Let me explain!

Saturday, we decided to head back up to Bishop's Stortford and go to the letting agents.  He also wanted to stop in the information center to ask them about a place for short term stays.  Also, on our agenda, was to pick up a pay as you go cell phone for me as well.  Super Handsome decided that we should go to Bishop's Stortford first and I should lead.  I almost told him we needed the mobile phone first! Looking back I probably should have.

So, we got on the M25 (major highway that circles London) and then proceeded to get onto the M11 to head north (major highway that runs north from London to Cambridge).  I totally panicked and headed SOUTH on the M11, into London.  As soon as I did it, I realized my mistake.  Super Handsome did not follow me and he wondered what the heck I was doing, so did I!!!  So, I had to take M11 to the next exit (which, BTW is nothing like an American exit) which was about 9 miles away and then I had to follow this road east for, um at least 6 miles.  All in all, my panic attack cost me 45 mins and at least 20 miles!  Grrr!  Not to mention that I was not sure where to meet Super Handsome now, as we had not discussed what to do if we got separated!  I had Kid 2 in the car with me.  After a bit of swearing, "****, I just lost Daddy!", "Mommy, don't say the S word!", so I said, "Well, what would you like me to say?  Hurray!  We just lost Daddy?", which was followed by laughter.  We made it up to Bishop's Stortford and to the letting office and where Kid 2 and I found Super Handsome and the rest of the boys.  Phew!  We made arrangements to view two properties on Sunday and left.

We headed off again, this time I was following Super Handsome.  We drove around a bit, I think that we were suppose to find the Tesco again, but Super Handsome ended up getting side tracked and we visited his work instead. It was an anxious time for me, as it is not easy to follow someone in the UK.  Instead of 4 way stops and lights, they have round abouts, all over.  Some of the round abouts even have lights.  For the most part I was able to keep up and I did not loose him.  We finally made it to Tesco.  We were hoping to use our current phones to get mobile service, but none were unlocked.  So, we finally ended up purchasing a pay as you go phone.

Saturday, we also finally paid for internet.  Super Handsome needed to buy the UK maps for the GPS so we could figure out where we were going the next morning!

Friday, Our First Full Day!

Friday, we headed back up to Bishop's Stortford.  We were looking for schools and homes.  So, we started out by visiting Bishop's Stortford College.  That was a total waste of time.  They are a big school and highly rated.  It has a beautiful campus and goes from nursery school all the way to age 18.  I was really hoping they could accommodate us.  But they only were able to accommodate 2 of the boys and then they were unwilling to because we would not be here for the duration.  Ok, fine fancy-pants school, we don't need you either!

Then we headed to the information center.  I headed to the train station again to try and park.  Well all the spaces are for permit holders.  Well, that is not going to be me!  Colin swore he remembered parking by the center, so I headed into the center of town, small, teeny, tiny roads and all to find it.  We made it and I parked behind another vehicle, all seemed good!  We headed in and got a map, a list of letting agents and other helpful things.  We had only been inside 5 mins tops.  I hurriedly remembered where I parked and asked if I was in an allowed area.  The lady looked out to where I was parking and said, "Oh, no, you can't park there!  Hurry now, they are there to give you a ticket!"  I instantly ran out and the Bobbie and cried, "no, please I will move the car right away!"   I kept profusely apologizing as she repeatedly told me how lucky I was as she could easily ticket and fine me.  That by not ticketing me she was saving me a lot of money.  Phew, I am so glad she did not ticket me!

So, I then headed to the catholic schools.  The receptionist politely gave me registration information at the desk of the school for the older boys as the registrar was on vacation.  The primary school also gave me forms and let me know they had a wait list.  Hmmm, this was obviously NOT going to be easy.  I went to one more school, another primary school.  The headmistress was wonderful!  Liam and Cian went in and she gave us a tour of the school.  Really it was not much different then Covington, the school that we just left.  The teachers all had Smart boards.  Instead of a computer lab, they had a cart and the laptops were brought to them.  They had a rather small library area but they had a very big playground and a small area with trees that they called the forest (a mislabel for sure, but cute sentiment).  Liam loved the school and really enjoyed the tour.  Cian held my hand and was not so happy to be there.  Poor guy grabbed my hand through most of the tour, which is kind of unusual for him.  He is definitely feeling some anxiety and he is enjoying his break from school immensely.  

What I ended up gathering from the very kind and helpful staff at the school was that I needed an address so then I could find the school.   They kindly suggested some letting agents for me, letting is what they refer to as renting in the UK.  So, I headed back into the town center and this time I was lucky enough to figure out where it was legal to park! (and I did not listen to Colin)  :P

I finally headed to the letting agent.  I visited as many offices as I could.  I managed to find out that Londoners are moving in large numbers to Hertforshire or Herts (a UK county) because the schools are so good.  So, currently there are not a whole lot of properties to rent.  Fabulous....  things can never be simple, can they?  Also, as you may have concluded, the best schools are all full.  No real surprise, is it?

So, I met Sean back at the hotel, armed with all this information and we headed to Hertford to grab dinner.  Well, because we did not have a booking (reservation) the two places that we tried did not have any space for us.  So, we ended up in a pub and enjoyed dinner there.  Sean and I were the only ones that ordered a traditional dish, he ordered the Steak Pie and I had fish and chips with smashed minted peas (which are very good BTW).  The boys all ordered things that they could get at home and we warned them that at the next restaurant the would need to choose something else!

When we arrived in Hertford we parked in a garage.  When we arrived we had actually missed the pay period so, our parking was free.  But we had to be mindful of the time because the garage closed at 9pm.  We arrived at the garage by 8:45 to find that in door was down, further investigation found that the stairwell and the elevator was locked.  We started to get a bit worried.  So, we looked around and asked questions and luckily saw the person who was locking up and he motioned to us to lift the door (where we entered).  We tried with no luck.  We headed to the exit and found it open (thankfully!).  We left quickly, no need to get locked in!

We made a quick stop at a super Tesco (similar to a Meijer or a Super-Walmart) to look at their mobile plans.  Then headed back to the hotel and called it a night.  We were still pretty tired and trying to recover from jet-lag.

Hitting the Ground, Driving!

We arrived in Heathrow and immediately went to pick up our cars. While at training we had determined that we probably needed two cars because of the amount of luggage that we would have. A car that would seat us all and our luggage was not something that Super Handsome was comfortable driving because of the size of the roads.

When we went to pick up our car we once again found out that our reservation was messed up (if this seems to be a reoccurring theme, you would be correct!) So, Super Handsome arranged for us to get two cars. The first car has been smoked in, so Super Handsome had to take a bigger car than he wanted. He let me take the little BMW 1 seris and he took the Puegot estate (station wagon). I have been very grateful to have the smaller car on many, many occasions.

Driving on the wrong side of the car and on the wrong side of the road has been very interesting, to say the least! There are times that I do not want a car at all and then there are times that I see that I can't do with out one... in the future I will do some posts devoted just to the driving. I have already had some very interesting incidents, to say the least!

Our first stop was at McDonalds to grab a drink and a bit of lunch. McDonald serves different food here, a lot more chicken and hardly any burgers.  It seems to be a bit more healthy.  They also have potato wedges!

We arrived at the hotel to find yet again that out reservations were messed up. They only had Super Handsome booked for one room. Later, the staff figured out that I had been booked a room as well. The rooms though were not connecting or a family room.

The staff was very sympathetic and worked very hard to put us in rooms that were across the hall from each other with roll a way beds. They promised us a room change on Saturday. They got us into a room as fast as they could and we went in and rested for a bit. Super Handsome headed into work. Before he went he showed me the map of where we were and suggested where I should go. We had to use a map because Super Handsome had not had time to get the GPS updated with the UK maps! So, I headed up to Bishop's Stortford with the boys to have a look around.

We headed up to Bishop's Sotrtford and thankfully found a place to park at the train station. It was late enough that I was able to find a free parking spot. It seems that most parking spots you have to pay for, not many are free.   Parking is a pain, thankfully I have a small car to squeeze in small spaces, and as Kellie Wallace-Kalnajs and my other drivers ed partner (was it Kathy Hauge-Struecker?) might remember I have a gift for parallel parking in small places!  

 Then we got out and wandered around looking for the information station. They would have maps and other useful information for us. Unfortunately, they were closed. We were suppose to meet Super Handsome around 5:30 at the information station, since I did not have a cell phone the plan was to keep checking back every half hour if he was not there. After dark I decided to take the kids back to the hotel. They were exhausted. As we walked into the room, Super Handsome called. He met us back at the hotel. Everyone but Kid 2 went to grab a bite to eat at McDonalds, for the second time today.   As many of you may know McDonalds is one of my least favorite places to eat, in the world.  At least they seem to have some healthier choices here though.

One things that the kids and I discovered that they hate riding with me. They have some understandable reasons!  I have not driven a manual in a few years. It has not been a complete relearning process, but it has been definitely painful. It is a bit unnerving to driving on the wrong side of the road and on the wrong side of the car. There are a lot of things to adjust to and then I have to remember to shift.  I have killed the engine too many times to count, mostly because, I end up sticking the gear shift in the wrong gear because I am panicking. The hills were a bit stressful at first, as well. I also tend to jerk the car a bit when I shift because I take the clutch out to fast! :) I like to drive my car like a race car!  Sadly, it makes the kids feel a bit woozy, especially when they have not had much to eat!  My older two remind me often as we are getting in the car that I go to the OTHER SIDE now.   I have had at least one person tell me to drive on the "right" side of the road.  Once when I was following Super Handsome when we were late for a viewing appointment, I pulled out in front of a man in a delivery van and he SCREAMED idiot at me.  Sadly, I just laughed.... and honestly, it still makes me laugh.  Maybe because he sounded a bit like Yosemite Sam when he is screaming at Bugs Bunny?  :P

On the plane with Thor, god of Thunder

I would recommend to you, if you have the ability to fly business class, do it!  Drink the free champagne, and drink up, because you did already pay for it!  We sat in coach and the champagne was NOT free!  (darn it!) Sadly, it was not as comfortable as my last trip to Italy when I was able to sit in business class.  Our flight was a bit over 7 hours. During this flight I sat with Kid 3. The movie selection was not  exciting for either of us. The rest of my family enjoyed watching Captain America, The Green Lantern, and the X-Men. Kid 3 and I are just not action type movie people. We will watch them with the others, but if given the choice we would prefer something else. So, Kid 3 watched the Disney channel and I watched parts of Midnight in Paris and a bit Downtown Abby, from last season. After dinner, Kid 3 broke his headphones into the arm rest. So, he was not able to listen to his show which worked fine as the lights were turned down and we tried to get some sleep.  It was very hard to get comfortable and I did not sleep much.

The funny part of the flight came as the steward was serving breakfast. To give you perspective, he looked like the foreign exchange student in the movie “Sixteen Candles". (You know, the one in the tree calling out "Ohhhh, Sexy American Girlfriend!"  bahahahahaha) As he is serving me breakfast, he points to the three rows of two that we have by the windows and asks if they all belong to me. I, of course, tell him yes. He then says that they are all so well behaved, especially the last two (my oldest sons). He proceeds to tell me how impressed he is and how polite they were because they called him “sir”! He then told me he wanted them to call him something more exciting and less formal, like “Thor, god of Thunder”!